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  • How to manage grief and sadness related to being childless not by choice

    Grieving is a part of the path to accepting childlessness not by choice. Grieving childlessness can feel isolating, you are grieving something that did not happen. Those around you may not see your grief, understand your grief, or related to your grief. When a loved one dies there are shared traditions and expectations societies have developed to mark this event. To support each other during those times of grief. There are no traditions or expectations for grieving being childless not by choice. If you are grieving childlessness here are some tips you might find helpful.

    • Support- Consider seeing a therapist or coach. Acknowledge to yourself that you are grieving and have a right to grieve. Respect the fact that you have/are experiencing a trauma. Process those feelings out loud in an emotionally safe space.

    • Seek Community- Attend groups that have other childless people in them. This could be virtual or in person. Community, support, having your experienced validated is healing. Social media and meetups are some places to look for these groups.

    • Exercise- I know…. this is always brought up when discussing mental health and/or stress. It is not to say if you exercise you won’t experience grief anymore. Exercise can help relieve tension, improve mood, and increase distress tolerance.

    • Exercise Part 2- Consider joining a studio or exercising outside the home. Due to many people finding effective ways to work out at home many studios are putting in extra effort to build community. I go to Cyclebar and Rumble and they go out of their way to create a supportive environment and often schedule social gatherings for members after class.

    How do you manage grief related to childlessness? Did you realize you were grieving?

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